Wife Behind the Badge
I FIND MYSELF WONDERING
Often I will find myself wondering what he is doing when on shift. Is he helping an elderly lady, attending to a domestic violence victim, responding to a 911 call, helping a child find their lost mom or dad? Not only that, but I wonder what situations he narrowly escaped from to be able to come home to us that day or night.
I STRUGGLE IMMENSELY
Being an officer's wife has been one of the hardest jobs, next to learning to be a mother, I have ever taken on. I like to think that my career as a child protection social worker helps me to be able to understand a little bit better what it is he goes through when he puts on his badge. I will be the first to admit I struggled immensely in the beginning, and still do with supporting him. I get short with him and hate that he isn't home on the weekends to play with his son. I get mad when he is resting after working a night shift when I come home from work and pick up our son, make dinner, bathe our son and clean the house feeling like he doesn't help. The thing is, I keep telling myself he DOES help. He keeps us safe, and not only that, but he keeps others safe as well. His job is demanding, and the most I can do is not be demanding at home and be understanding.
MY FAVORITE SOUND
Being a wife to a cop takes an immense amount of patience and listening when needed and learning to read your officer. I have learned that when your officer feels supported at home then he can go out confidently and do his job and not have to worry about home. A few months ago I was randomly asked what my favorite sound was. While I thought this was a very strange question, I found myself thinking hard about it. I was stuck between two things: velcro and a baby's laugh. I went with the first one and the person asked me why. I knew they wouldn't understand because they aren't related or married to an officer, so I changed it to a baby's laugh. Below is my reason for why I picked velcro and also explains a little bit more what being a wife behind the badge can feel like at times:
She is sleeping, not as soundly as she normally does, but sleeping none the less. She hears the morning creeping in with the birds chirping, trees rustling, and the sun beginning to peek over the lake. Then she hears his car pull up the gravel driveway and eventually his keys in the door. The locks turn and he quietly comes into the room. He thinks she is sleeping and he begins toremove his heavy belt and hangs it up, takes out his ear piece and puts away his radio. He then starts to take off his uniform and her favorite sound takes control of her ears as he rips off his Velcro vest.
When that Velcro sound echoes in the dark room she can finally let out her heavy sigh and feels a wave of relief wash over her. She can rest easy now, knowing that the vest did its job. He is home safe. She can’t believe it until that sound takes place. The vest means everything to her. It is the one thing that determines if he lives or dies. To her that Velcro vest is more than just fibers being knit together, to her it is his protector. She often wonders just what that vest protected him from that shift. That vest will see him through both his best and his worst days.
Even though she will never fully comprehend what he does day in and day out his vest knows everything. That Velcro vest knows all of his worries, laughs, thoughts, fears, and best moments. That vest can feel his heart beat when he goes to a domestic call or a lost child. That vest feels how tense he becomes when he has to follow his oath and do everything in his power to make sure he is protecting his community. It protects as he runs towards the danger and not away from it. That vest coming off at the end of his shift means he is home, safe, able to be with his family. To you velcro may seem like an insignificant piece of material but to me velcro means I get to have another day with my officer, my hero, my husband.
About the writer: Breana G. is a member of Backing the Blue Line and loves her Law Enforcement Officer.