Blog Post

  • Caitlin S., Backing the Blue Line member

This One's for the Girls

My coworkers were rolling their eyes at me the other day when a fabulously sparkly maroon and gold water bottle (complete with my husband’s badge number and the outline of the state of Minnesota) showed up on my desk. It was made for me by the wife of one of my husband’s partners. I joked it was MY reward for 10 years of dedicated service to the Minnesota State Patrol.

But here’s the thing-my creative water bottle making friend is not just the wife of one of my husband’s partners. She’s a confidante. A keeper of fears, consistency, and #allthethings that go along with being in a relationship with a LEO. And as far as I am concerned, she’s part of the inner-circle. We’re not besties. We don’t talk everyday or exchange birthday gifts. In fact, I don’t know all that much about her, but we are members of a pack. We share a foxhole in this journey. A sisterhood that binds us together regardless of differences. She gets it. She gets that this role means sleepless nights, heart pounding phone calls, and missed family gatherings. And all of that “extra” goes without saying. Basically, she’s all in.

Since joining Backing the Blue Line a few years ago, I’ve come to witness first hand just how incredible, inspiring, and life-giving the police wives, partners, and spouses of Minnesota’s officers truly are. I’ve been lurking around in a BtBL sponsored Facebook group dedicated to fitness and wellness. Although I am not an active participant, I couldn’t help but be floored by the recent results of a diet bet that began in November. At the end of January some of the women in the group had collectively lost over 600lbs. These women are not fitness fanatics. Or marathon runners. Vicky, their fearless and fantastic leader simply volunteered a few years back to be the group’s admin. She’s not paid in dollars, but she is paid in real change. The women of this group were simply seeking the support, encouragement, and vitality of their peers. Whether it was joining on whim (like myself) or because they needed the support, what they came away with turned out to be far greater than their victories on the scale:

“My coworkers cheered me on and my boss loved the idea [of the diet bet] so much she wants to do a biggest loser challenge at work.”

“There are so many different options for exercising and being fit-which is represented across the group...It is easy to be inspired by others who are sharing consistently and being consistent.”

“This group pushed me out of my comfort zone to make healthy changes! The competition pushed me far past limits I thought I had.”

And the love and support doesn’t stop there. BtBL has numerous facebook groups and volunteer opportunities dedicated to the unique capacities of its members. You can workout, pray, and sell your kid’s Pokemon collection all in one stop. There is truly a little something for everyone. And my gut tells me that need for women who get the blue line life will long outlast social media- these women won’t quit.

The need for women who understand why your daily schedule is a delicate balance of the unknown and the routine-the need for those women? It won’t quit.

The need for women who know what it’s like to find bullets in the washing machine and evidence bags holding leftovers in the refrigerator-the need for those women? It won’t quit.

The need for women who know what it’s like to shovel the driveway, mow the lawn, and snake a drain-the need for those women? It won’t quit.

The need for women who chase their careers, chase toddlers, and chase their dreams-the need for those women? It won’t quit.

The need for women who run the schedules, run marathons, and run their mouths against injustice-the need for those women? it won’t quit.

These are the women who hold a spot for one another. The women who say: “Be exactly who you are, ask for what you need, and get it done. I’m holding a place for you.” These are women who are as different as they are alike-but who recognize how fast those differences fade away when not a single one of us has a crystal ball to predict the unknowns of policing in America. And how about our dedication to one another? That won’t quit, either.

There’s a saying floating around that there is a time for justice and sometimes there is a time for just us.

So to my BtBL gal pals, I raise my snowy, tired shovel, my {his} broken-in trooper academy sweatshirt, and my sparkly maroon and gold water bottle to you-because you don’t quit.

And if you’re in a relationship with a Minnesota law enforcement officer- know that we’re still holding that sacred place just for you. Come on in. It’s just us.


Interested to learn more about the 6 friends every LEO wife needs? Read about it here.

Are you in a relationship with a MN Law Enforcement Officer? Read more information here,

About the writer: Caitlin is still in her rookie year as a Backing the Blue Line member. She is a member of the marketing committee, a SWAT attendee, and a professional "heart emoji clicker" in BTBL's private Facebook group. She is a middle school special education teacher and chief chaos coordinator of twin boys. Her dream job would be a talk radio DJ. But only if she could talk about the fluffy stuff. Her husband, a Minnesota State Trooper, has been in law enforcement for 10 years. He is literally and figuratively the brakes to her lead foot. More of Caitlin can be found on her blog, Minnesota Gingham.

#Relationships #PoliceWifeLife #Bluesisterhood

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